Atlanta Birth Photographer is sad during voluntary quarantine
I genuinely think I’m hilarious and I laugh at my own jokes. My ex hubby used to say the only funny thing about me was that I thought I was funny. That’s why we’re not together anymore! J/K. My new guy finds me delightful ;-) But also agrees that I’m not funny.
I’m an ENFJ. I’m 98% extrovert to be exact. Although I have a house full of children (which I’m now homeschooling simultaneously while working from home) I find myself feeling isolated. As a single mom and provider, I recharge with my friends.
My friends are struggling too. We all feel a bit confused with loss of income, loss of future plans or loss of connection outside our home. Even trying to connect on the phone is challenging with a zillion children at home, screaming in the background. I honestly haven’t been OK.
So I created a checklist for my COVID-19 Quarantine sanity.
There are many ideas online for you to try, but this is what works for me. When I’m sad, it can be debilitating. I have to encourage myself that even the smallest step is a step in the right direction. I don’t want a bunch of options, this list is a short and you don’t have to make your bed- yay! Every news station is reporting on the impact of isolation on mental health. So be proactive now, before it gets too rough.
My goal in writing this is similar to when Will Smith in “I Am Legend” talks to the mannequins. I don’t really expect anyone to read this, but I needed something to focus on. I’m trying not to lose my mind, guys. I chose to blog this Holly Springs outdoor photo session with my thoughts, feelings, and this checklist that I’ve been trying to adhere to. Doing this blog is accomplishing that! Gold Star sticker for me (see below).
Here are 13 things for extroverts to try while you’re stuck at home and wilting away
Take a shower everyday : Trust me, you’ll just feel better. You might even feel energized. While in the shower, take deep breaths and ask yourself what is one thing you can do today, just for yourself.
I chose to do a photoshoot just for myself. And then this blog post. Booyah!
Put on some music : Georgia Cates put is best when she said, “Music is what feelings sound like.” So be sure you put on something that makes you feel happy. You can sing songs, have a dance party or exercise, the point is to enjoy yourself.
I made up a song (see below).
Go outside : Even if it’s raining… sit on the porch or just open your front door. If it’s not raining, consider going for a walk.
I bet you’ve been wondering what these photos had to do with being a sad, lonely, extrovert– and now you know! I did this outside session as a part of trying to bring joy in the midst of missing people I love.
Evaluate your priorities : This quarantine may be difficult, but it really isn’t about you. This is about protecting all the people you love and all the people you haven’t met yet! Think about the fun parties to come and all the new friends you’ll make.
I chose to pray for the inflicted and their families. I chose to pray for my loved ones and I’m grateful that this mess hasn’t hurt anyone I know. My energy was renewed as I was reminded of the purpose.
Try something new : Try a new recipe, learn a new skill or listen to a new podcast. Just try something outside of the ordinary, the goal is to occupy your mind in a positive way.
For me, it’s this blog post. Sure, it’s written terribly, but my goal was to practice being vulnerable. I’m not overly concerned with the writing, I’m getting over my fears of being judged. Maybe next I’ll take a writing class. Maybe
Make genuine connections : When given the opportunity to connect with your friends on the phone or messaging, use the time purposefully. You can send funny memes, play online games together, complain, or dive into a deep discussion. The point is for you to feel connected.
I reached out to a few close friends and asked them how they thought I could grow as a person and I gave them the opportunity to share any observations they had. Since I have time on my hands, I can to educate myself on changing, should I chose to do so.
Do something you can control : Being quarantined can have you feeling a lack of control through confinement. That lack of autonomy can drive even an introvert insane. You might not mind hanging out around your house, but what about homeschooling your children or being forced to still work from home? Focus on the things you can control- rearrange furniture, clean a room, or stay up late.
For me, I haven’t really worn clothes. I LOVE IT. For some this might be depressing, but for me, pj days are liberating!
Help others : I’ve seen teachers offer to tutor other grade levels and an organic carpet cleaning business offer to do grocery runs for the elderly. Maybe you can send the most hilarious memes or go on FB live to show your friends how you can roll fondant effortlessly. Whatever it is, helping others benefits everyone involved.
Is it really helping someone if you tell other people about it? But for the sake of this post, which I’m sure nobody will actually read (other than myself 4 years from now, so that I can cringe, obviously). I’ve spent hours on Facebook and messenger trying to encourage and love on the pregnant parents who are currently freaking out over their birthing options. Honestly, it’s not very rewarding as I feel so helpless, but I know that just being a listening ear is what some people need right now.
Be gracious with yourself : Imagine your best friend calling you crying because they were struggling. After listening to them tell you all about it, you would immediately try to encourage them. Be your own best friend and be gracious with yourself. You’re an extrovert. You were put on this planet to love people, it’s totally ok to be struggling without your normal social interactions.
I was honest and I texted a friend, “I’m about to lose my mind with this house arrest mess!” They loved me enough to reality check me, “This isn’t about you.” I didn’t judge myself for struggling, but I didn’t stay and sulk either.
Reward yourself : I have a super fun extroverted friend and her life has been transformed through a reward system. She loves stickers; puffy stickers, funny stickers, scratch-n-sniff stickers. So when she accomplishes a goal or task, she gives herself a sticker in her fun notebook. This won’t work for everyone, but there is a genuine dopamine release when you reward yourself in a way that excites you.
I have some expensive oils that I only use occasionally. I plan on rewarding myself with my bedroom filled with the sweet scent of Whisper. My children, however, have been getting edible treats for doing school and doing their chores.
Find balance with social media : Some are finding joy in connecting with their family on FB, while others are experiencing mass anxiety at news postings.
I appreciate the news postings. Although stressful, it reminds me WHY it’s so important for me to stay the course and #staythefuckhome
Focus on the future : Get excited about planning a gigantic game night! Or how about finally being able to travel again. The more we stay home, the sooner those desperately long awaited times will be here!
I honestly have so many plans, it’s too many to list. But I’m excited to indulge, engage, and love on all my peeps.
Video chat : People have been loving this. I sit back and observe. I know there will come a time when I need it and participate in it, but not yet. Have fun with that.
I’m dreading this. I don’t like it because for the first 5 seconds I’m all excited to see someone, but then I spend the rest of the time crying about how much I miss them. Seeing their mannerisms, body language– it’s both terrific and terrible.
I’ll end on that note. Enjoy the pics of my lovely girls and read my song below :)
Here’s the song I came up with in the shower. It’s sung to “Winner Takes it All” By ABBA Also hardcore relating to S.O.S
I don’t want to talk
About things we used to do
Though it’s hurting me
Now it’s history
I used to drive to see my friends
And that’s what you’ve done too
Nothing more to say
No D&D to play
Coronavirus takes it all
Social gatherings are small
We will have victory
That’s our destiny
Im locked in my house
Because I belong there
It just makes sense
Living on defense
Locked in my home
I’ll stay healthy there
I am no fool
I’m playing by the rules
The gods may throw a dice
Their minds as cold as ice
And someone way down here
Loses someone dear
Coronavirus takes it all
Social interaction has to fall
It’s simple and it’s plain
Why should I complain
But tell me do you have
Toilet paper with you?
Does it feel the same
You stockpiled without shame
Somewhere deep inside
You must know I miss you
But what can I say
Rules must be obeyed
The government will decide
The likes of me abide
Spectators of the show
Always staying low
Quarantined again
No lover or a friend
TP packages big or a small
Coronavirus takes it all
I don’t want to talk
I just feel sad
And I understand
You can’t even shake my hand
I apologize
If it makes you feel bad
Seeing me so tense
Loss of confidence
But you see
Coronavirus takes it all